I heard this story as a little news tidbit on the radio the other day, so I had to go look up the whole story to get some background on it. Apparently a woman in New York is filing for divorce from her husband of 17 years, citing “depraved sexual conduct” which supposedly went so far that now she even suffers from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder!
This original article is from the New York Post, and can be found at
http://nypost.com/2015/08/31/wife-has-ptsd-from-husbands-twisted-sexual-antics/
However, in case that link is ever down for some reason, I will also quote the article in its entirety here:
Woman says estranged husband’s twisted sex demands gave her PTSD
The top administrator for the Nassau County District Attorney’s Office is a twisted fetishist who wore a chastity belt to work and diapers and a horse tail during sexual foreplay, according to court papers obtained by The Post.
Jeffrey Stein’s obsessions even involved his former boss, Rep. Kathleen Rice, with him paying a psychic to “determine” her romantic life, a Nassau Supreme Court divorce filing says.
Stein’s estranged wife, Carole Mundy, suffers from posttraumatic stress disorder as a result of his sexual antics, Mundy says in her divorce petition.
Stein — the DA’s chief administrative officer and a prominent Long Island Democrat — engaged in “predatory and extreme depraved antisocial sexual conduct so egregious it shows a blatant disregard for the marital relationship that it shocks the conscience,” the papers say.
Mundy claims Stein — the campaign chairman for then-DA Rice’s 2010 bid for state attorney general — favored kinky role-playing that included him dressing like a “sissy maid” and calling himself “Jessica” while kneeling at Mundy’s feet.
He also liked to pretend to be animals during their 17-year marriage, the 14-page document alleges.
“Husband wore an anal plug with a horse tail and pretended to be a horse by galloping around the marital residence,” the filing says.
At other times, Stein pretended to be a cat who “used [a] litter box and cleaned himself” and wanted Mundy to walk him on a leash, the papers say.
Stein, a former appointee to the county Board of Elections, also acted like a baby who needed to be fed and diapered, the papers say.
Mundy said he even took his perversions to work.
“Husband showed wife that he was wearing a male chastity belt with locks under his clothing to wear to work at the Nassau County DA’s Office,’’ the papers say. “Husband told wife that he received sexual gratification from wearing this device at work.”
It was plastic so he could pass through the metal detectors at the Mineola courthouse where the office is located, the papers say.
Mundy also claims he paid a psychic to find out where he stood with Rice “personally and professionally.”
“Husband’s obsession with the personal, professional and sexual life of his supervisor at the Nassau County DA’s Office was disturbing to wife,” the filing says.
Mundy’s lawyer, David Mejias, told The Post: “My client has been traumatized for years by the depravity of her husband and by his insistence on reliving the abuse in open court. It is a bedroom nightmare that no one should have to endure.”
Stein did not return messages seeking comment.
The couple has no kids.
Now, I can see how some people might be rather horrified by this. And yes, some of his little “perversions” probably are rather extreme. I might say that about things like not only acting like a cat, but USING a litter box? Really? At the same time though, part of me feels a little bit sorry for the guy for being so publicly shamed for things that went on (mostly) in the privacy of his own home. I mean, I know that some things I enjoy may not necessarily be deemed socially “normal” either! Just because I don’t necessarily understand his kink doesn’t mean I should sit here and judge him for it, any more than I would want people to judge me for mine! To me, that is all stuff that should stay between him and his wife, only clearly in this case his wife was truly NOT into it at all!
Yes, his seeming obsession with his supervisor is probably not healthy at all, and could surely be adequate grounds for a divorce. Heck, if the wife was really that uncomfortable with ANY of those activities, then it certainly sounds like divorce was pretty much inevitable anyway. But she put up with it for 17 years?? And now suddenly she has PTSD from it? Really?? It seems to me that she would have been aware of his behavior for a very long time, and must have at least been pretending to accept it. Of course I know nothing of these people’s lives beyond what I’ve read here, but I just have to wonder how much she might have gone along with and maybe even participated with him HERSELF over all those years. There is nothing wrong with wishing to end the marriage if they have proven to be that incompatible with each other, but the claim of PTSD seems a bit far-fetched (at least in my opinion!)
Of course, based on my own experiences and the whole theme of this blog, probably the main tidbit that piqued my attention the most from this story was the part about him wearing a chastity device to work and receiving sexual gratification from doing that. Being locked for weeks at a time, I also wear the Queen’s Keep to work. And yes, I would have to say that there is some sort of sexual gratification there. In the beginning, it may have been partly just the novelty of it, and knowing that I had this little “secret” in my pants that none of my co-workers would ever have any idea about. But the more Angel has gotten into being my key-holder, it doesn’t really matter if I’m at work, or happy hour, or a ball game, or church, or at parent’s houses–wherever I am or whatever I’m doing, the sexual gratification at this point comes from knowing that Angel has full control over when I get out and when I can orgasm! She will always be the center of my attention!
But I digress–back to the point.. In general, is it OK to wear a chastity device in the workplace? Obviously I’m a bit biased here, but I’d say Why Not? I don’t think it should be flaunted at all to unsuspecting co-workers who don’t know (and probably don’t WANT to know) about that part of your life, but as long as it is still kept private, who cares? Will anybody really notice if there’s a tiny bit of an extra bulge in your pants? If you happen to walk just a little bit funny, or are extra careful when bending over to pick something up? If you disappear into a private stall every time you go to the bathroom rather than stand at a urinal? I think it would be very unlikely for anybody to notice, much less say anything, for ANY of those things! The local radio hosts who were discussing it were really trashing the man for the chastity device (among other things mentioned in the article). But I just had to think that there’s a pretty good chance they might even have at least one co-worker of their own coming to work in chastity, and nobody knows about it!
I mentioned this article to Angel the other day, about what this guy’s wife was claiming. I asked her if she really did enjoy the things that we do with each other, and wasn’t just going along with it for my sake. Without reading the story for herself and obviously without any further knowledge of these people’s 17-year marriage, she agreed that some of the stuff he was doing was probably way over the top. But as for what we do in regards to chastity and other “bedroom play,” she assured me that she really does enjoy it and isn’t just holding disdain for it inside to eventually lead to divorce. It is very nice to have a wife that not only enjoys being rather adventurous with me, but is also easy to talk to about things like that! Although she did joke with me, that now that she knows, she’s glad to hear that a PTSD argument could be on the table if she ever feels that she needs to use that one in the future! Lol
As @eonserotica said, “It reads more like an article written in service of the wife’s lawyers in an attempt to villify the husband and besmirch his character.” I also thought to myself Sure PTSD, right, diagnosed by her lawyer, I’d be willing to bet.
Regardless of the information we don’t know, I feel horrible for this man. His life will never be the same and it’s his wife’s fault.
Interesting article. I do find his obsession with his boss a bit odd but that could be because his wife shunned him for his desires, or possibly refused to participate anymore so he sought out another participant. I don’t think it should’ve been his boss. I feel like there is more to this story than what is being told. The only things being told are deflammatory to this man and his wife is being made to look like a saint when everyone had a demon or 10 to contend with that they want to keep hidden.
People sometimes have their kinks. Sometimes, if you trust your partner you reveal them. 17 years. Shouldn’t she have figured it out the first time and left if she wasn’t into it? Seems like a tactic for more money. A kind of blackmail.
The problem with this article is the purposeful use of inflammatory language, such as “perversion,” or “depraved.” Further, the word “predatory” doesn’t seem appropriate when talking about someone who wanted to be coddled like a baby or walked on a leash. Do these behaviors really seem predatory to you?
It reads more like an article written in service of the wife’s lawyers in an attempt to villify the husband and besmirch his character.
That said, without knowing more, I’d be hesitant to jump to his defense. He very well could have been heaping psychological or physical abuse on his wife for years. Anyone who’s been in that kind of relationship will tell you that it can be a nigh impossible cycle to break.
Even so, butt plugs and chastity belts are hardly perversions. Sadly, anything that falls outside of the missionary position these days is often demonized, and rarely discussed with openness and honesty. This is why we need blogs like yours to shine a light into the darker corners of human desires!
That’s a very good point, and one that Angel also made when we were discussing it, that it’s entirely possible the guy could have been abusive in other ways as well that we just don’t know about. You’re absolutely right, I also hesitate to defend him outright without knowing more of the situation. It just kind of bothered me a little bit that these would be the only types of things that would be brought out publicly against him to paint him as a “bad person.” Thank you very much for the thoughtful comments!