As more and more people discover and read parts of my blog, I inevitably field a number of various questions around chastity. I do try my best to get back with at least a brief answer for each and every question that comes up, and many of them even become an entire topic for a new blog post. One question that seems to be asked most often is simply “WHY?“ Why the heck would I actually WANT to be locked in a chastity device and be denied orgasm? I write often about all of the orgasms/pleasure that Angel is receiving (at my “expense”), but what about MY pleasure; isn’t that important too?
As I thought more about it, I realized that I have written pretty extensively on various blog posts about WHY I enjoy chastity so much, but I can’t recall ever dedicating one single post to that topic alone. So here it is! This should give a pretty good rundown of why I allow myself to be locked in chastity (and even ask for it). When I get this question in the future, I may very well start redirecting folks back to this particular page, so if that is you, please don’t be offended that I didn’t type out a personalized, lengthy response to your question. I think this should give you the very basics, and if you want to know more about literally ANY aspect of the lifestyle that I haven’t covered enough of here, please feel free to keep asking questions! If you ask about something that I either don’t know or don’t have any direct experience with then I will tell you that; but if I have any insights/opinions on the topic then I’m more than happy to share it!
First of all,
WHAT is Male Chastity?
For more information there are numerous resources online, or I could also recommend some light reading with The Toybag Guide to Chastity Play [Yes, a real BOOK! Lol]
Ok, so…
WHY would a man want to be chaste?
Well for starters, I happen to enjoy the confined feeling of wearing a chastity cage. That’s not something that I can really explain “why,” but I would liken it to “why do you prefer certain foods over others?” or “Why do you like certain types of music over others?” Everybody is wired a little different, and I’m quite sure that not EVERY man would appreciate not being able to get hard because there are a couple of steel bars in the way preventing a full-on erection. But I enjoy it, so that’s pretty much that. When we first upgraded to a metal device, Angel did express some concern about it hurting me. I assured her that it really did not hurt at all, and it could actually be thought of more like a piece of jewelry… People wear rings, piercings, etc. all over their body with no problems. This is just a different place to have jewelry like that, and it also happens to have an added function of preventing erections! Angel did seem to feel much better about it after that explanation.
Besides just the feeling of confinement, there are SO many other feelings that come from wearing a chastity device, both physically and mentally. For one, I find that I am “aroused” almost constantly. No, there is no erection to show for it, but sex is on my mind to some extent pretty much all day long. I realize that for many men this would be very frustrating, to be so conscious of their sexuality but not be able to sneak off to some corner and take care of it.. But over time that changes to more of a craving! As Sarah Jameson writes in her e-book “Be Careful What You Wish For,” a man in chastity may WANT an orgasm, but he CRAVES denial. I definitely do find that to be true!
and Finally,
HOW does one live, not having sex?
There is just something very good and fulfilling (to me, at least) about giving up control of my sexuality and instead focusing all of that energy onto my wife. When I get to watch her (and even better–help her) have one or more orgasms during a session, that energy often seems to be enough to satiate BOTH of our sexual appetites! As counter-intuitive as it may seem, I am truly not exaggerating when I say that I can and do derive my own pleasure vicariously through Angel’s. As long as I get to keep helping HER to orgasm regularly, as much as I may want one I really don’t NEED a release for myself.. At least, not very often. I’d probably draw a line before saying “Never,” and we are certainly not at that point in our lives anyway.