There are a few other chastity sites/forums (besides mine) that I follow fairly religiously, and will chime in once in a while on various subjects when I feel I might have something relevant to say. I’m not going to call out the other sites here, but it’s likely that at least some of you reading this have probably seen me perusing other groups! 🙂 Anyway, one topic that seems to come up on a somewhat regular basis is that of revealing your chastity device to others. Especially others who may not know anything about this kind of thing, and probably don’t WANT to know anything about that side of your sexuality! Most of the time in the groups I’m reading this is centered around chastity specifically, but it can usually also be applied to revealing any other “kink” to unsuspecting persons, and it generally gets into the issue of consent vs. non-consent as well.
The place this comes up most often is when talking about wearing a chastity device in a locker room, be it at the gym, pool, or elsewhere. I guess for some locked-up guys it’s kind of exciting to be exposed in that type of environment with a risk of being seen, or getting “caught.” These usually turn into fairly lengthy discussions, with at least one person adamantly stating that it is NEVER ok to purposely force your kink onto non-consenting outsiders. It’s an interesting debate. I can see both sides to this, and I think locker rooms in particular seem to be a pretty big gray area.
First, when it comes to exposing non-consenting people to my kinks, I agree that generally speaking that is wrong. I would never, for example, purposely pull down my pants while walking down the street or in any other public venue to reveal that I am locked in a chastity device. Even if I WASN’T locked, exposing myself in that kind of environment would be wrong (not to mention illegal in most places), where people have a reasonable expectation that everyone’s going to be keeping their clothes on!
In a locker room, yeah that’s in a way sort of a public venue too, but at least it’s segregated by gender and everyone expects to encounter naked people there. For the most part I think people tend to just keep their head down and mind their own business while letting everyone else tend to theirs. If anybody IS looking, there are all kinds of personal things you might see that wouldn’t normally be visible outside of the locker room. (i.e. hidden tattoos, piercings, etc.) I don’t necessarily think that seeing somebody in a chastity device in this scenario should be any different. Most people, even if curious, would probably just ignore it and move on with their life. Worst case (if it’s really even a bad thing) maybe it would end up being a conversation starter, and “enlighten” someone about something that they never knew anything about before. As long as everyone involved is being civil about it, there shouldn’t be any issue.
Now that’s not to say that someone in chastity should ever just run around the locker room naked, flaunting it or anything like that. It’s one thing if someone “happens” to see it, but even there I wouldn’t consider it ok to FORCE everyone nearby to look at your kink!
For myself, I still try to stay in a corner and keep covered as much as possible, and as far as I know nobody has ever seen my device. But partly why I do that (and yet another caveat to the whole locker room question) is that I have only ever been in this situation at the local YMCA, in the evenings, when there are also lots of children coming and going from swim classes. I definitely don’t want to be exposing that type of thing to them, for their parents to have to try to figure out what the heck they’re even talking about if/when they start asking questions! If I were a member of a gym or something, and knew that it would only be adult men in the locker room with me, I still wouldn’t just outright flaunt it but might tend to be more lenient about completely hiding myself.
To me, the bottom line is that everybody has their own unique interests, style, and way of living their life. It’s what defines each of us as an individual. When I walk down the street and see a person with giant holes in their ear lobes for some really large guage rings, I might think “OK, that’s not for me–but good for him/her for expressing themselves in that way!” In that example, from what I understand (with my admittedly very limited knowledge of it) that’s a fairly permanent body mod. So pretty much every single person that they ever meet for the rest of their life, will be immediately “exposed” to that side of their personality whether they like it or not. No, it’s not like we’re talking about a “sexual kink” here with that example, but really if someone in a locker room happened to find out that I as an individual happen to be into chastity, is that really so bad?
As always, let me know what you think. I’m always interested in other’s opinions on these types of issues! 🙂