Thrill of the Chaste

I had a series of questions from a reader that I wanted to share on here, about Mature Metal Devices and effects of Long Term Chastity on the psyche.  For some background, this actually started on a different forum where a question was raised about the longest period of time that people have been locked in a chastity device.  I shared that I had made it just over 4 full months of being continuously locked (see that story here).  This led to a rather lengthy private conversation with this gentleman (Fantiesiza) about what device I was using and generally how I “dealt with” being locked for that long.  Here are some excerpts of that conversation, reposted with his permission. The quoted parts will be Fantiesiza’s side of the conversation, followed by my responses.

 

Fantiesiza asked:

Hi there,

I have read your comment in a group about longest period without cumming.  You claimed a significant period of time continually locked. 

What type of device is it?  Did you need any time out of the cage for cleaning or stress relief?

Hi, Fantiesiza-
Thanks for the message! I do love talking about this kind of stuff, as it’s not exactly something I can bring up around my more “vanilla” friends in real life! 🙂

I am using a custom steel device, specifically the Queen’s Keep (from Mature Metal).  Going custom, I think, is the only way I would ever be able to have made it that long, as any of the off-the-shelf devices that I had tried before either didn’t fit quite right to be sustainable or else definitely would have to be taken off periodically for cleaning.  Of course, that aspect could affect certain custom devices as well, depending on how “closed” the design is.  I opted for the more open design of the Queen’s Keep, and it really is much easier that way to keep it clean while still wearing it.  I can get plenty of soap, water, Q-tips, etc. between the bars to keep everything pretty fresh, as long as I do that on a daily basis (basically just a few extra minutes every time I shower!)

And no, there was no real “stress relief” for me during those months.  When locked, my relief really does end up coming in the form of being able to get my wife/key-holder (Angel) off! I know that sounds a bit strange to a lot of people, but the more she gets into keeping me locked for longer and longer periods, I think my body & brain might be getting a little bit rewired or something to make me think/feel more like that! 🙂

[At this point I also directed him to my blog in case he wanted to read about my adventures in much more detail!]

 

Fantiesiza responds:

Hi thanks for your prompt reply.  I’ll visit and read that blog, I’m sure I’ll find some interesting stories.  I read a few of these people claiming long stretches in different devices, and in some cases I find it really hard to believe.

I started wearing a plastic cb-6000.  I found it to be really unhygienic and it eventually split down the middle where the device is joined, causing some pain and minor injury.  I then bought the current device, a generic chrome plated steel device, but I’ve had to cover the ring in heat shrink to avoid the pinching from the hinge. Unfortunately I can only tolerate it for about 5 days before it causes serious discomfort. 

I’ve looked at the mature metal store, sounds like it’s the best option for long term play.  I’ve only heard positive reviews.  However the price is pretty serious, it’d be the most expensive sex toy I’d have bought.  The wife has shown that chastity play is one of her most favorite elements, so eventually we’ll buy one.  That idea turns me on and frightens me at the same time.

 

Yes, I hear you there!  Chastity is definitely a two-edged sword, being very erotic and scary at the same time!  I started with the cb-6000 as well, and had some of the same issues (the shorter version, cb-6000S, actually worked much better for me). I thought that one was pretty comfortable, and did have a few stints of several weeks at a time in it, but you’re right that those are very difficult to keep clean.  Once I went with a custom device I quickly found out what I’d been missing!  Yes, they are expensive, but if you are really serious about chastity it is well worth it in my opinion!

I’m glad to hear that your wife is already into it too, as that will make it much easier as well as a MUCH more enjoyable experience!  Mine was very hesitant at first, but has really grown into it and come to enjoy it as much as I do.  It has been an amazing ride with her and I’m very proud of how far we’ve come just in the past year or so!

 

So how was your experience with mature metal?  Why did you go with the queen’s keep, opposed to anything else?  I think they have a variant called the jailbird, I was looking at that as an option.  I remember they advise a smaller gap for comfort, are they referring to the space between the cage and ring?  How is a smaller and tighter spacing more comfortable?  Did you end up going with an oval ring or are they all oval rings?

I’m not sure of your disposition, but I know that when I’m sexually frustrated I can get a bit aggressive, which isn’t positive and doesn’t help to keep the buzz of the chastity experience alive.  Did you or do you have similar experience?  How did you and your partner handle it?

 

Mature Metal was fantastic!  The ordering process and everyting was quite easy and shipping was very fast.  They are also very responsive to any inquiries, both pre and post order.  I did have one small problem after I got it with the security screw starting to strip out a little bit, so I contacted them about it, sent the device back in, had it repaired and back in less than a week!  As I see that you are in Australia, I guess the turnaround could be slightly longer just due to international shipping, etc., but I really cannot say enough about both the service and product quality that came from my experiences with MM!

Yes, they do have the JailBird as well, which is almost identical to the Queen’s Keep.  I quickly narrowed it down to those two just because I liked the more “open” design of those compared to some of the others.  It felt like it would be much easier to keep it clean that way (and it is!) The only real difference I could see between the two is that the QK has a slightly wider bar at the very base of the cage portion.  Personally, I just liked the looks of that better, but really it’s all about your own aesthetic tastes…

I did end up going with an oval ring, and have been happy with it.  The round one may have been fine too (my previous plastic devices all had more “round” rings), but I probably won’t order another one like that to find out.  I would highly suggest getting their measuring kit before ordering so you can try it out and get the right size, as that is very important for long-term comfort!

As for the gap spacing, I don’t remember the exact numbers but I know they have their “standard” gap, then one a tiny bit smaller, and one a tiny bit larger.  I did go with the smallest, and it’s been ok–but then again I was already pretty used to wearing other devices.  If in doubt, the standard size would probably be fine there.

I do highly recommend making the cage portion as SHORT as possible!  They give directions on measuring frequently to get the most “flaccid” length.  Once you have that number, I would subtract AT LEAST another 1/2 inch!  It may seem a little bit counterintuitive, but you do want to be pushing all the way up against the end of the cage when completely soft.  Part of the issue I had with my first “practice cages” was that there was too much room to grow inside them.  I couldn’t get completely hard, but enough so that it would start pulling the entire cage away from my body, putting some rather painful pressure on the trapped balls… Now that I have a properly sized device and cannot even START to get hard, that problem has completely gone away!

As for your last question, I guess I’ve never really had that issue too much, so I may not be the best person to ask.  I’ll still give an opinion at least, that you can take as a grain of salt! 🙂  For me, it probably tends to go more the opposite direction, where I tend to be a little bit more (aggressive may not be the right word, but irritable maybe?) within a few days AFTER I’ve had an orgasm!  The longer I’m locked, I feel like I tend to be much more attentive and all of my focus is centered more on my wife than on getting release myself.  And that dynamic has been VERY good for us!

I’m no therapist, but I’d have to say that the fact that you at least recognize this “aggressive” behavior in yourself is a good place to start!  Since you know where a potential problem area might be, you guys can talk about it ahead of time and try to figure out how to deal with it if/when it happens.  I would say just start slow with a few hours at a time until you start getting used to the device, then try it overnight sometime, then for an entire day, then a couple of days, and so on.  When you’ve set a goal of how long to be locked, it might be up to your wife to stay “strong” and not let you out early…  Any pent-up sexual energy should be redirected back to HER, and helping HER get off (if she’s not multi-orgasmic yet, that may very well change too!)  If you’re anything at all like me, over time you will start to get as much out of HER pleasure as you do your own!

Good luck if you do decide to go through with measuring/ordering from Mature Metal.  You won’t be disappointed!

 

Hi, thanks for your detailed replies.

Aggressive isn’t the right term, it’s more frustrated, also learning to let go and be more submissive, or accept that I am getting what I want when my wife is in control of the key.

I’m looking into mature metal now and I think that is the next step for us.  I like wearing a cage, and I would like to try longer stints.  My wife tells me she likes me in the cage.  So after a discussion I think it’s the way forward with this in our lives.

 

Well again, good luck to you!  As you already know that wearing a cage is something that you enjoy, I believe that it will get even better when you have one that fits you perfectly.  Being able to “let go” might take some time, but you’ll get there.

I might even suggest just writing everything down, in a journal or something.  This blog has been a great outlet for me, as a place to just put all of my thoughts/feeling out there in black & white.  It is a lot of fun (and even therapeutic at times!) to be able to go back and see just how much things have changed since I started.  I think the best part is seeing how far ANGEL has come with all of this since we started!  It has been quite a journey, and I feel very blessed to be married to a wonderful woman who has been willing to go on it with me!